Sigh...

Its been, like what, 2 months? I look at my blog almost daily. And what do I see?
My First Time
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The Protagonyst
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Depressing Life
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and so on.

I see this and sigh. Do I suck that bad? Am I miserably constricted in my own literary world which I feel is a notch higher than most wannabe writers that I can't notice the obvious disinterest about my creations? Or am I just unnoticed?

You see, 2 months- 60 days is a long time even for not getting noticed. People tried to comfort me. 1 says, " Your blog is way better than most." Another says, giving a hypothetical approximation, “Only 1 out of 1000 people comment." They are my friends after all; they won't want to hurt me. I want to believe them. I don't.
Sometimes.

Coz after these depressing thoughts subside, I get angry. Real pissed. The reason being the variety of blogs I have started surfing through to get a reality check of my own pedestal in the blogging world. And what do I realize? People who make their life a web diary, people who open up to the world about their most intimate feelings are most well received, commented, loved and popularized. Even those that use their blogs to show off their crappy creations are liked. A person who writes 'receive' as 'recieve' more than once in her story is blessed with OHH LOVED IT! WHAT VOCAB YOU HAV! So do I do that too? Talk all kinds of mushy stuff, write about the trivial-est of daily issues and start whining over my lost girl-friend to get more hits?

WHY, is the question boiling inside me. Why does unadulterated ape-shit get so acknowledged? How can people like reading about strangers and go all AWWW over their apparent love, pat a sympathetic YOU WILL GET OVER IT SWEETIE, YOU ARE WAY BETTER FOR HIM, and whoop an excited YIPPIE over some moronic teen who just got a new teddy and applaud at a lustreless story about a woman whose art house sales dipped, she confided in a stranger and bingo- next day he came and bought off all the paintings. Even blogger has this lame-
Labels for this post:
e.g. scooters, vacation, fall...
Is this what we are expected to write about, Blogger? My old trashed scooter, the winter fall fashion and how my vacation rocked?

Say what, maybe I should tell you about the new pair of underpants I got. Red, they are. Got a gap down 'the thing'-place. Quite soft and comfortable too, and so light that you feel you haven't worn anything at all but still, your thing isn't bouncing. Or should I whine about “How could she do this to me?"

Do I hear you going “Uhhh"? Ya? Really?

Retards.

I give a fuck guys. Although I know blogging world is all about symbiosis, I can be rest assured with a comfortable thing that I have. That you can't ever take away from me. Self confidence, it is called. Indifference doesn't affect it. Praise doesn't bolster it. Criticism doesn't deflate it, instead pushes it to better oneself. So I can be comfortable in my own identity, in my own tiny space I have etched in the blogging world. Besides, I always got something to boost myself up whenever I feel down, if I do- sift through BETWEEN THE ASSASINATIONS; OH SHIT, NOT AGAIN! (A book that guarantees to make you roll with laughter. All it helped me do was yawn) LOVE, LIFE... and what not, some of the books I unfortunately laid my hands on once upon a time. Reading them, I realize, literary standards needed for publishing have come down to such low level that you don't need your grammar to be correct, or have a proper plot-line or need to make sense to be published. Write tripe and be assured-you stand to get recognized. Why, tomorrow even a blogger who starts his day with a religious MORNING! NICE DAY, IT LOOKS. I THINK IM GONNA TAKE A BATH. C YA FTER D BATH (WHEN I'LL BE TYPING WID TOWEL AROUND MY WAIST. LOL!) will become a global sensation, with chicks crying out “Towel guy, marry me!".

But you know what; it’s not been all bad. Some people, though not here, have told me about what a great blog I have got, some friends who didn't know about this are stunned at my abilities...in general, and I have got just encouraging and sometimes flattering feedback. Thank you all for that. But it’s just that I want more. And I want it here- on blogger. Coz an empty C-Box doesn't give exactly a positive impression to a newbie visitor.

So this is a request to all the readers out there, express your goddamn self. And here-on my blog. Don’t hold back whatever resentment or admiration or suggestions you have. A hungry yours truly awaits them.